Posted in Chaya's Journey, Insights, Self Determination

The Self is Dangerous

My instinct was to change the gender on the above quote. But then it wouldn’t be a quote!

It has been a month now since just one more friend left me. This one didn’t like my way of thinking after taking years and many hours of my time, that I know that we both enjoyed. We supported each other, checked in on each other and in one night. it was a two way street. Then poof she flipped a switch out of no where. It certainly something that had nothing to do with me. People can certainly take time in life to retrospect, but no need to try destroy people in order to push them away. In the past I would have owned what is not mine. But I can see in this year along. I so clearly see this is not my circus. I sending only healing light her way.

Since I was a little girl, I never really felt I fit in with the regiment of religion or groups. I seemed to have run into the types that love to want to control. When they realize they can’t… they go in a major destruction mode. I’ve seen this pattern. I may fall a little bit, because I didn’t realize what hit me! I get up fast and I get stronger! There is always the person that said I didn’t get up fast enough. I have strong faith and there was always an instictual twinge within me saying….Nah! I always beat to my own drum. Everytime I go against my grain and try to fit in, I am the one that pays the price. As I got older, I really get tired of the trying. It is about taking advantage of my kindness…then using it against me. Some said along the way if they were me they would do it better. But guess what they are not me and it did what works for me. May not get done as fast as one would like. The end result was the main thing.

This doesn’t mean that I should isolate, or be mean to people. It means spend more quality time with me. Reflect, speak and listen to spirt. As I keep speaking my truth, I step into my truth. All the things people wanted of me, droped by your wayside, it simply didn’t fit! Just maybe all those years I’ve been feeding my emotions so I can fit in places that I really didn’t want to be. Did society really require my attendance? I just didn’t need to be there. Each second, moment and day is a new beginning to start fresh. If by me living by my own integrity is shining my light to bright. So be it.

Posted in Chaya's Journey, Grieving Naturally, Insights

Automatic Writing

I found this article that I have cited to be a very useful how to bit of info. I have used the process of autowriting for several years. I have not been able to receive messages audibly from spirit. I found that putting a pen to paper seemed to connect regularly for me. The messages are clear. I always ask for the highest and best purpose.

In the beginning I could not read what I wrote. So I asked spirit for me to keep my eyes open so I can reread the messages later on. Well I started to question message. Didn’t seem real. Then I just put the pen down and i started to scribble. I realized it doesn’t matter whether or not i can read it later. I got the message when i did. I rewrite later. Everyone is different. When I first started this work, I thought I wasn’t reaching spirit correctly. I wasn’t doing it psychically. But I was getting messages. Very important messages. This has helped me even more since my boys have past. I have been able to communicate with them.

This is very healing for me. It goes along with a lot of my journaling. I’ve looked back at many of my messages and it has made me smile what I’ve accomplished since writing. Try it and have fun. It is important to connect with your inner self. Take time for you. We all have the power to speak with our loved ones. They are all around us and would love to communicate with us. I went to a few mediums and one simply said do autowriting he has something personal he wants to tell just you. I started to trust the process at that time, more than ever.

Levesque, Angela. “Your Guide to Automatic Writing.” OMTimes Magazine, 23 Mar. 2014, omtimes.com/2014/03/sacred-scribe-guide-automatic-writing/.

Posted in Chaya's Journey, Insights, Overcoming Emotions

Stormy Weather!

Stormy weather is not the trees blown in the wind, nor are the surprises coming from the weather people. They are the people who you least expect it to come from at full force with no warning. I can not control these people, nor do I wish too. But just because they say that I should, I could or do anything, doesn’t mean that I have too, nor does it mean that I’m a bad person or not a good friend. It means I do not do things in the same way or the same manor as they do. I can not control these types. What hurts is you had faith that these people are your friends. These storms come from out of left field like a tornado. I’m disappointed that is true. I can’t control the weather, but I can control me.

I’ve ducked for cover and wait out the storm during these times. I’ve had these blast of weather surprises come at me more than I care to mention. I have had to exercise the art of patience over the years. I’m a good friend and a listener. But that art of patience is not my strongest virtue when I’ve been dealt blast of stormy wind. I do not wish to be whipped around with the waves of emotion. I can either stay in its path or protect myself. I do not intend to be caught up in this one. I will wait out the storm. My strength has not withered, it is just knowing that this was not my storm to whether.

Posted in Chaya's Journey, Insights, Overcoming Emotions

I’m Possible

We all have rough days. So more difficult than others. But we have to choose whether we want to mire in the muck or move forward. It’s a rainy type of day. My bones hurt and I can really surrender to going to sleep and stay in there until the morning.

For me when I feel things are impossible, I come into the office and start typing. I can write myself out of impossible and realize that I am possible. Sometimes this is a daily task. It works for me. Then I’ll take it a next step and talk to someone on here or on phone that I know that I can help. It gets me out of being in a pity party. Leaves me with a good feeling. What do you do to get you out of an impossible mood?

Posted in Chaya's Journey, Grieving Naturally, Insights, motivation, Overcoming Emotions

What is impossible?

To me this saying is to get past the fear, is put one step in front of the other. That sounds so simple. When you are in the middle of your deepest fear, depression or anxiety…you just want to smack someone when they say something so cliche!

When I read this quote. The first thing I thought of is to start with a cup of coffee!. That is necessary. It gets your mind thinking. I worked years amonst engineers and they always had a cup of coffee in their hand as they walked around with their minds in a creative place. I had many days that I looked at the white screen that needed words on it desparately. My mind was whirling and couldn’t figure what to write. I went to famous quotes, then images created my own meme in Microsoft Publisher. Wala, I have an image. No… it wasn’t my quote, No it wasn’t my image. It wasn’t even the original image the quote was on! But what it did is it made it possible for my mind to start writing and journaling.

The next step will be the impossible. That will be my own images that I create, and the quote maybe my own.

I see that this quote is a useful one especially when I don’t want to exercise. Just getting up is necessary. Walk a few steps, Then what I thought was impossible was walking down the street daily. Not quite there yet. When I go through difficult challenges, something so simple as starting with a cup of coffee or getting up off my butt…just might be the very thing that sparks the impossible! This could be used for organizing too. I have a few piles of stuff to be addressed! Looking at it this way. The Impossible is action. It becomes possible and then necessary! Try it!

Posted in Chaya's Journey, Energy Healing, Grieving Naturally, Insights, Self Determination

It’s Time

I spent many years staying in the house. I did not exactly not have a good excuse and I used them all. Mainly no access to a vehicle, because of my partner’s work. I had a horrible accident back in 2011 with a 18 wheeler. It has left me with a challenge to walk. Something happened…maybe a divine intervention. I don’t know. But it wasn’t good on his part but definately for me. He landed in the hospital. He’s doing a little better. But he can’t work. So guess who has to drive.

It was easy to stay in the house and have a pity party. But I went online and found things to do that I like. I went to a meditation group and joined a book club. I love it. I’m not done yet! I’m going to be able to start doing Reiki in at the meditation group. I know my son wanted to me to get out more and be independent. I really started to do that after he passed in January. But then got quite comfortable sitting in my spot in front of the TV. I need to stick with this. My soul has been crying out to meet new like minded people. To come alive again. I loved getting out.

I’ve very glad that D (my partner) is doing well by the day. But he can’t really go out and work yet. When or if he does. I made an agreement to use the car in the day and he can work at night. He likes waking up late and I’m a mornings. It is amazing how you are thrown road blocks and then when you take a minute you get to see how they were not at all meant to block you but to free you!

Posted in Chaya's Journey, Energy Healing, Grieving Naturally, Insights, Self Determination

Leadership is about vision and responsibility, not power …Seth Berkley

Back in about 2008, I started my Masters program in Strategic Leadership and Personal Development. I completed 3/4 of the program minus the internship. At this time my eldest son found he had brain cancer. Just couldn’t put two words together at the time. Years since, i wanted to finish my program. The school since closed and life just took me away to this past year where I lost my second son to sepsis.

I feel that the life experience that I had gone through these years certainly can be justified as an internship. I don’t think there is a more difficult road to follow. The loss of 2 children. My story, my strength, my work, my studying says it all. So this degree might have taken a round about direction. But I landed where I needed to be. Many parents are losing children more and more unfortunately. But my story is my story. It is something only to be experienced. These writings are the beginnings of my book. No one can tell me that I am wrong or right…once you lose someone, especially children. I am at a level in spirituality that I am ready to face whatever God is about to hand me. Because I have already survived the most unimaginable task of giving my children up to spirit. I got a message from spirit in meditation not to long ago. I was told that my children are in good hands and now it is my turn to heal and work my purpose.

Just when I think I have been through the worst, my life partner ended up emergency with Congested Heart Failure and Hypertension. He was in there for a week and now I’m here and have to face this. I felt myself getting soooo mad. How dare he. I was just beginning to feel a bit better. Then in this morning meditation, I realized it was me I am mad at. I need to be able to fulfill my purpose no matter what is thrown at me. All will be well. That insight was not an easy one to face. I’ve already been though enough. This has got to stop. But I saw, inspite of everything that goes on around me, I have to heal myself first. All else will heal by itself. Just by being.

I got my marching orders. I’ve always been a healer, and my path is about helping others. I just never got the clarification before hand about what I was helping others with. Leadership is about leading yourself first then others. The determination to do so comes from my inner being. My Masters Degree is complete! So it is! Next…

Posted in Energy Healing, Self Determination

My opinion is ok with me!

One thing you will come to know about me. Is that I will respect your opinion. But my pet peeve. Is when my idea is not respected in return. This is when I get a tad irritated. It is ok to have my opinion.

When someone questioned me, sometimes I would fluster and change my opinion in my early years. I don’t need to. I believe in the idea that we can heal ourselves is an idea that I have stuck by for many years. It is what I believe for me.

I bring forth ideas that I have tried or would like to try for towards a better healhy me. I am not telling anyone to ditch their doctor. You can do many of the these methods in conjunction with having doctor. Like deep breathing. What I would like for you to understand. Many times you can try natural remedies before you rush to take medications. Grief is not a mental illness. It is a natural process we go through when we lose someone. Why would they prescribe a med for this?

I live in a 55+ state of Florida. If you go into the doctor, you will see people carrying in a Walmart bag full of medications they take. Many times there are more than 3 for each body party they are hurting. I just ask you to question this. Why need 3 -5 pills for one modalady? Really? All the effects of one lead to more ailments and more pills which lead to effects. Is this what you want?

Did you realize that if you want to take a vitamin that you are unsure of, you can check with your pharmacist. They will check it out and print out any conflicts. Usually vitamins don’t have many, but they can. So wise to check. Just to be sure.

Because I choose alternative ways of healing, doesn’t mean I don’t get sick. What I do, is listen to my body. I know when I’ve done too much of one thing, I pull my self back and get back on my program. I have to take responsibility for my own health, so how I do it is my choice and doesn’t mean It’s wrong. I find when I start to get myself off sugar, and any junk food. Start to eat well. I do feel wonderful. My arthritis lets up, I’m not in pain. Many other changes start to happen that feel great! The magic happens in this moment! What are you going to try that is new this week to take care of yourself?