Over the recent years, I have found that grief has many faces. People who lost a child is not the same as someone who lost a parent or spouse. Now, this does not mean that it is any less significant. It is different. I spent many hours reading and in groups, trying to make sense of it, if you can at all.
Then I realized that people who have lost children have different types of experiences as well. I have not lost a child at birth, through an accident, or very super young. My heart goes out to them. But when you have a child that is in his 20’s, 30’s or more. You got to know them. You raised them. You got to watch them grow, all their firsts, all the times you kissed their wounds, held them and comforted them, watch them in their accomplishments and made you proud. It is just different!
But understand when you tell me how all your children are around you. When you know your kids are going to be there at the holidays, the phone calls have stopped. All the commercials are on TV and you realize, oh yes I don’t have to get anything. You can’t be afraid to talk to someone, but be sensitive if they are having a hard day. Don’t take it personally. You find you are all alone a lot…no matter who is around you.
If that is not hard enough. Then you lose both your children. I don’t want you to understand. But sometimes I don’t want to suck it up either. Move on? Really? I hope you never get to know what it is like to lose lose a child or two. Grief is a process. it is not a mental illness. You have to walk through it. In your time not everyone elses. Not all days are bad. When you go with the flow and acknowelege that..the feelings are just part of loss. Allow yourself to be with your broken heart. You will always be ok! I promise you. As time moves on, I have more good days than not. There are only 24 hours in a day and tomorrow will be better!
“Respect your efforts, respect yourself. Self-respect leads to self-discipline. When you have both firmly under your belt, that’s real power”…. Clint Eastwood
With each day, I am finding that I am getting more disciplined. I am owning what issues I need to address and do not own the ones that are none of my business. Sometimes there is a fine line between the two. I have to take a deep breathe then say… That has nothing to do with me. I found with age. I’m getting better with that.
At times when you are vulnerable, we tend to own what others think we should. They are very persistant. It is important to take time to shake off what doesn’t belong to us. There are a lot of psychic vampires that are around us. Those are the ones that don’t like to see you succeed. Don’t like you see you happy. They will go out of the way to bring you down.
As above, so below. When things are happening here on earth, assume there are plenty of energy particles floating around that you don’t see, that can affect you. When I sometimes describe a psychic vampire, I say that it is like you walk into a meeting with a suit of velcro on…and when you walk out of there you have all these energy balls stuck to you. These are the energies of the ones throwing negative thoughts your way. They have their own anger but they want you to own them. They don’t want them but who better than you. You are vulnerable, you will accept them and they don’t have to anymore.
You don’t have to be in a vulnerable spot to be hit by this energy. You can be happy and your life going well. The key is noticing this is what is going on in the moment. Catch it and return it back to the sender. Visualize putting up a mirror and the worst words are going back to them. Don’t own it. If you are an empath. It hurts you worst. Many times you just accept it because of fear. Ask yourself fear of what? Is it my fear?
There are items, amulets and talisman with different symbols that can protect you. Black tourmaline is a good protection. Many cultures have various power items you can use. Many times it is harder when you are around family and very close friends. Your guard is down and they are the last ones you would suspect. Zap …they got you. Each time you catch it, as it is happening. You get stronger. This is self-respect. Because you do deserve it. No one can have power over you unless you hand it to them. Love yourself today
It is very easy to look at the memes that flash by our paths daily on social media. This one in particular was one I wanted to address here. It is easy for someone to say don’t listen, walk away and stay firm. But when you care about someone, invested significant time in a relationship, friendship… this seems impossible. It hurts, it sucks and it is just not right.
What is important is step back. Take a look at it. What was my part in it. Did I have something to do with it? If I did, I’ll try to talk to them. Will they listen to both sides? Was it both parties? Talk it out. Even better did it have anything to do with me at all? Some people just need to put a blame on someone else for the difficulties, saddness, insecurities. They need to feel better and they do it by putting you down. They don’t have a life many times and why they feel they need to attempt to destroy yours too.
This behavior is infultratred in the media. Bullies have been around for centuries. However, how we react to it is what matters. Intellectually we know this. Especially if you are an empath. It is like a smack in the face. It leaves you numb and frozen. It is ok to have these feelings. But take a deep breathe, and revert back to don’t listen, walk away and stand firm. Have a discussion if you think they will be receptive if not. Don’t take that personally either. It’s their problem, not yours. You will be ok. Just because you are.
Feng shui definition from Merriam – Webster.com is – a Chinese geomantic practice in which a structure or site is chosen or configured so as to harmonize with the spiritual forces that inhabit it; also : orientation, placement, or arrangement according to the precepts of feng shui.
This system governs spatial arrangements and the flow of chi (energy). It is based on the 5 elements of the Earth, Fire, Metal, Water and Wood . These elemental qualities flow continually in a cycle. One item can enhance or deplete the energy in your home or life. Buildings are built to coordinate with this mind set of energy flow.
The system itself takes some study to fully understand it. I found that I learned enough that but just eliminating unessential things in my home, the energy flows a lot easier. I just straightened up my desk and design table. I made room for me to work. Creativity starts when there is a free flow. This is Feng Shui in the simplest form.
When you align with wall, you get to see how you would align furniture and assessories in your home. This is just a basic chart. Keep in mind it also needs to incorporate your own elemental. Karen Kingston books are usually pretty good on this subject for further study.
I have the Osho Zen Deck and I layout my cards according to the Bagua. You can get the Osho Zen Deck also on an app. Not sure of the layouts they offer. I only have actual cards.
This is a free download where you could enter your birthdate info. You want to know what your day sign is. This company has a good training as well. There is a professional version 4.2 available too. I do not believe that not knowing your birth time would affect your day element.
Have fun and get back on any findings. Looking forward to your comments!